5 Tips for Getting Back Together with Your Ex
Break-ups can be tremendously difficult to work through, but getting back together can be even more challenging. Here are 5 tips that might make it easier.
Thinking of getting back together with an ex?
If so, you need to be absolutely certain that doing so is really the best move for both of you.
The last thing you want to do is go through all the pain of the initial breakup for the second time in your life.
But how do you know if it’s right — and not going to add more stress to your life?
In this post, we’ll tell you why honesty, self-growth, and communication are the foundations of getting back together.
Read on to see if you two are truly meant to be.
1. Be Honest
When you’re thinking of getting back together with an ex, you need to make sure you’re being realistic.
Are you seeing the relationship through rose-colored glasses?
Did it end because of things that each of you can actually change, or did you split because of basic ideological disagreements?
Things like a difference of opinion about having kids, spiritual beliefs, or even strained relationships with friends and family members aren’t always fixable.
If you don’t agree on the big things — or want the same things — it won’t work.
Make sure you’re being honest with yourself about whether or not a reconciliation is truly the best thing for you both.
Of course, you’ll likely be able to tell if your ex is thinking about you and wants you back.
To recognize the signs of a potential twin flame reunion, check out this post from 10 of Cups Ministries.
2. Talk it Out
In any relationship, communication is key.
But when you’re talking about getting back together with your old flame, it matters more than ever before. If you can’t communicate without getting angry, accusatory, defensive, or even just shutting down, it won’t work.
Set guidelines and boundaries, and write out your feelings in a letter if that makes it easier.
Agree to drop the small and petty disagreements, and focus on talking about what really matters. Avoid statements like “you made me,” “you always,” or “you never.”
Instead, opt for things like, “I feel,” “I want,” or “We should try.”
3. Work on Yourselves as Individuals
Believe it or not, getting back together with an ex also means you both need to commit to improving yourselves outside of the relationship.
Spend time with your friends one-on-one, not as a couple. Start a hobby for yourself.
Get back into your old passion projects. Start volunteering, see a therapist, and get into self-care.
Once you love yourself, you’ll be ready to love your ex again.
You’ll also have your own life and interests — so you’re not putting the pressure on another person to give you everything.
Getting Back Together is Possible
If you think that getting back together is the right move for you both, make sure you understand how much work it’s going to be.
Love yourself first, be honest about whether or not it’s worth it, and always take the time to communicate.
Remember, reconciliations take time — they don’t happen overnight.
Looking for more love advice?
Check out our website and blog for more tips on how to spice up your romantic life.